Hello my Sunday Friends! Hungover? Wonderful! Nothing says: “Happy Hangover” like a good list of The Chad’s favourite things (to hate).
Alright. So I have compiled this lovely little list of things that I have found people tend to do on a daily basis… and these things tick-me-off like nothing else! And you know what? I can guarantee that I’m not the only one who gets ticked off in these instances either. So are you ready? You sure? Let’s begin!
10) Starting my lovely list, this honour goes out to people who talk on their cellphones in public… while also being oblivious jerks. Before I delve into this little tick-off though, let me just say that I realize we all use our cellphones to talk in public (myself included) but there are a few social rules that certain people can’t seem to grasp onto. Please note that there is no reason to yell, the other person will hear you… cellphone’s have come a long way since their brick-shaped staticy brothers and sisters. Also please note, cellphones were meant for on the go. This is to say, you are supposed to use them if you are outside, travelling, etc etc etc. If libraries and museums wanted people talking on phones while inside the premises, then they would have installed landlines! So if you’re in one of these places, don’t start a conversation because you think no one else will mind. We do mind and you’re not royalty!
9) If your Facebook status’ are too personal and bat-shiz crazy then you sir and/or madame have just made my list. I get it, Facebook status’ are meant to be personal; they’re a reflection of our daily lives and the things we find interesting. The problem? Some people think that all of their friends are interested in the messed-up details of their personal lives. For instance, if your Facebook status starts out with “OH YEAH, WELL F*** YOU, I DIDN’T WANT TO BE YOUR GIRLFRIEND ANYWAY, YOU HAVE A SMALL P**** JAKE AND…” then maybe it’s time to start hitting backspace and consult a therapist. Also, icksnay on the capslock-ay.
8) People who spoil movies and/or books. I had a girl in one of my classes ruin a key plot thread in the movie Contraband (2012), starring Mark Wahlberg. When she did this, the entire class groaned and proceeded to glare at the back of her head. Don’t do this. There’s a reason you have no friends.
7) Drivers. ‘Nuff said. I mean, honestly, there is no way in hell that 80% of the people on the road should be on the road. Did none of you ever take Driver’s Ed? Also, I’m sick of adults who like to say that it’s the under-25 generation who are the most dangerous on the road. I know for a fact that anyone over the age of 45 has probably never taken a Driver’s Ed course and they’re the most reckless and ignorant drivers on the road! Furthermore, the whole 0% blood alcohol limit for Drivers 21 and under tells me that the Canadian Government is full of fools. It should be 0% for everybody. You’re not any less tipsy when you’re 40 than when you’re 20. You’re still tipsy. Idiots.
6) People who don’t clean up after themselves. There is nothing worse then when you’re at a foodcourt and the only places to sit have trash and crumbs spilled all over the place. I get that there are custodians but they should only be required to clean in the event of an accident! Do you want them to follow you to the bathroom and wipe your butt too when you’re done? The same tick-off applies for littering as well. Clean up your shiz!
5) Teenagers. Ok, so I know it sounds like I’m about to run outside and yell at a bunch of hooligans to get off my lawn… but seriously, these kids are getting out of hand, rude and disrespectful. There is no way that we were that bad when we were kids… were we?
3) Gym people. Ok, I’m not even sure where to start with this issue. I guess I will just try to keep this as simple as I possibly can… if you are going to go to the gym, then commit yourself for however long it is that you wish to be there. Don’t text people or sit on machines for 5 minutes doing nothing or talk with your friends on the mats doing nothing or sign up for machines and go half-assed, etc etc etc. You’re probably there for one of two reasons: to train for some event or get in shape (perhaps both). So if you aren’t doing one of those and sweating your balls-off at the same time then maybe it’s time to invest in a Shake-Weight and some old-school Richard Simmons workout videos for at home.
2) Talking and texting during movies. If you’ve read any of my early posts, then you know exactly how serious I take my visits to the movie theatre. And there is nothing worse then when you are so excited to see a movie and suddenly someone pops out the little bright-white screen that tells me they’re bored and more interested in a game of Tetris or the latest Facebook post. Well, tough. You committed to that movie so you can stick it out until the end! I think that you can take 1-2 hours out of your busy schedule to watch the darn movie and not have to be connected to the rest of the world. It’s alright, I think the planet won’t stop spinning without you. As well, don’t talk during the movie either! If you want to talk during it, then wait for the movie to come out on DVD and stay at home.
1) Parking. Topping my list of the terrible things that people do is their lack of education in parking. We’ve all had it happen to us: middle of Winter, we’re in a crowded parking lot and suddenly, we spot the closest spot ever! Wait, turns out that Tommy-Two-Spots has decided to take up 2 spots for himself just so no one will hit his “precious baby”. Or worse yet, someone will park right on-top of the yellow line so you can’t open your door when you do decide to park! Why do people do this? It’s not that hard to back out and adjust your car so it fits perfectly within the yellow lines! And please, do understand that I’m the type of person who will gladly rest his car door on the side of your car while I get out of my car. My car’s not that nice, I don’t mind if it gets a nick… what about yours? Nu-uh, I’m not going to bend-and-bow to your every whim. Learn to do shiz properly!
Fwew, that was a lonngggg list. But honestly, I don’t think I’m far off in catching all of the dumb stuff that people do! Have I missed anything? Please, feel free to chime in with your own pet-peeves over the stupid stuff that people seem to enjoy doing. I promise that tomorrow’s post will be back to the light-and-fluffy-happy-times that you are all so used to!